Rant of Ferox

Today I got some good news.

My dear boyfriend has had some oral surgery done for some wisdom teeth which weren’t sitting in a very wise position. That’s what happens when kids don’t go to the dentist.

Now he’s not allowed solid food. The bacon withdrawal is killing him. But that’s not the good news.

The Good news is that he’s not allowed to smoke while his mouth heals either.

I’m a stoic non-smoker, but I long ago gave up debating the smoking issue with him because it wasn’t getting anywhere. Our relationship has been harmonious due to a peace-making “Mouthwash Agreement” and the banning of pre-coital cigarettes. But now, for a few blessed weeks, he’s going to have to kick the habit. and maybe, just maybe, I can nudge him along to kicking the habit for good. Or at least until Christmas. Or maybe my birthday )April). Or maybe for good.

We shall see. In the meantime, he’s wandering around asking people if they have a spare nicotine patch, instead of a spare cigarette.

You only realise you’re addicted to something once it’s gone. No doubt hundreds of bloggers are feeling serious Entrecard withdrawal symptoms since the card-dropping system has been down for about 24 hours.  So what can you do with all this new found free time?

• Write a blog post. So many Entrecrd blogs haven’t updated in weeks, now is your chance!
• Pre-write more blog posts. For those of us with important events coming up, it always helps to have a little something extra saved away to keep a blog active.
• Post on forums. Go on, meet new people, visit their blogs, drop a comment and interact with a whole new bunch of people.
• Join yahoo! answers and be helpful. You might even be able to drop a useful link.
• Check to see if Entrecard is working yet.
• Re-design your blogs to optimize ad clicks.
• Submit to some directories. Remember the whole ‘backlinks are important’ beliefs you used to have before Entrecard?
• Search Google for the keywords you covet. Just how well are you doing?
• Check Entrecard again.
• Play with the kids or fur-kids. Remember them?
• Go for a walk outside. Remember outside? Count 300 steps if it makes you feel better.
• Play monopoly.
• Talk with your significant other (No, Entrecard is not a ’significant other’)
• Find a significant other.
• Sneak a peek at Entrecard once more, just in case it’s back online.
• Fantasize about the bargain prices your favourite blogs are going to have because nobody has bought an ad on them for days.
• Stress about your blog’s ad price because nobody has bought an ad from you for days!
• Wonder if you might be addicted to Entrecard.
• Look at some lolcats.
• Look at Entrecard one more time.
• Cry yourself to sleep.
• Wake up, repeat process all over again.

Hooked, much?

Dear Mr Spammer,

I would like to write to you in order to inform you that I am absolutely sick to death or your automatic spam comment takin gup my time and poluting the blogosphere.

No, I will not allow you to publish any of your thoughtless comments on my sight. Not the ones with five links, not the ones that consist only of a keyword, not the ones in mashed up english and definitely not the ones in French.

Increasing the quantity of spam you send isn’t going to magically let one slip past askmet or my own brain. I realise that for you it’s all automated, so takes you no time at all, but for me it’s saddening and I would like you to go away.

I would also like you to have a nice, long look in the mirror and think about what you’re doing. Then slap yourself with a fish.

From all bloggers, everywhere.