Well-meaning but misguided English teachers spent the bulk of my schooling trying to ‘improve’ my writing. “Show, not tell,” was one phrase that was touted about frequently. As was their insistence that we students replaced ’said’ with some other variation. This led to the impression that using ‘Said’ was for tiny children who didn’t know better only, and once you were old enough to write with a pen you would have to find other words.

One particularly keen chubby old English teacher was keen on pointing out pieces of prose that left out pieces of information. Pieces that didn’t describe the character’s appearance, allowing the readers to imagine. Better yet were those pieces “with such strong dialogue that you can identify which character is speaking without actually being told.” In other words, writers who had dismissed the need to attribute each spoken word to a character at all! Never a need to use ‘Said’ ever again!

But in reality readers like to know who said what, and how. There is a certain amount of ‘telling’ which is needed, and using ‘Said’ on occasion isn’t as big a Sin as it might have seemed in school. It’s a perfectly functional word, if lacking a little variety. It’s like a plain, white wall: perfectly functional, but if that was all you had to look at for days on end you’d go insane. (This may explain English teachers.) Use ‘Said’, but be sure to jazz it up as needed.

Below is a bad version of text. It will numb your brain. You wont want to read it. But do anyway, because it’s short and you’ll understand what English teachers have to put up with, and why they encourage as little use of the word ’said’ as possible.

“Leave her at town,” said Trill. “She’ll only get in the way.”
“We can’t leave her Trill,” said Detra, “She’s our responsibility now. We can’t dump her somewhere. You know what it’s like being an outcast. And we can guess what will happen to her. Remember Stae?”
“I remember,” said Veltra, “She died of the falling sickness. It was really running wild, and her profession didn’t help. As she is Jesse is naive and helpless. We can’t leave her, especially not in a large city that will take advantage of her. And you stop fiddling with that bandage.”
“I know, but she’s totally useless,” saidTrill, “I mean it’s not like she can do anything else, and it is the job of choice for talentless but not unattractive ladies…”
“You have your faults too, as do we all, and I’m sure you could get a job like that too, there would be more than enough employment opportunities for an exotic blonde…”
“Fine!” said Trill defensively, “but she pulls her fair share of work.”
“Of course,” said Detra.
“Is she magical?” said Trill
“She wouldn’t know even if she was. Magic is not used in her world. But if there’s even the smallest spark in her, Veltra can find it, can’t you?” Detra asked.
“And even if it doesn’t work, our own ability should be more than enough to cover for her,” Veltra said. “Coming through a wyrmhole like that, assuming she truly did, could mess her aura about quite a lot.”
“I think this one would be hard to mess up more than she already is,” said Trill.

Pretty mind numbing, isn’t it. You did very well for actually reading it. Here is an improved version, limiting ’said’ to where it is actually needed. Try not to wince.

“Leave her at town,” said Trill. “She’ll only get in the way.” She, Detra and Veltra were quietly discussing what to do with the still sleeping Jesse.
“We can’t leave her Trill,” replied Detra fiddling with the bandage on her shoulder, “She’s our responsibility now. We can’t dump her somewhere. You know what it’s like being an outcast. And we can guess what will happen to her. Remember Stae?”
“I remember,” said Veltra, twisting a lock of her hair absent mindedly, “She died of the falling sickness. It was really running wild, and her profession didn’t help. As she is Jesse is naive and helpless. We can’t leave her, especially not in a large city that will take advantage of her. And you stop fiddling with that bandage.” Detra folded her hands guiltily.
“I know, but she’s totally useless,” protested Trill, gazing over to the sleeping form of Jesse, who was snoring softly. “I mean it’s not like she can do anything else, and it is the job of choice for talentless but not unattractive ladies…”
“You have your faults too, as do we all,” retorted Veltra. “And I’m sure you could get a job like that too, there would be more than enough employment opportunities for an exotic blonde…” Veltra slapped Detra’s hand away from her wound again.
“Fine!” snapped Trill defensively, “but she pulls her fair share of work.”
“Of course,” smiled Detra.
“Is she magical?” wondered Trill
“She wouldn’t know even if she was. Magic is not used in her world. But if there’s even the smallest spark in her, Veltra can find it, can’t you?” checked Detra.
“And even if it doesn’t work, our own ability should be more than enough to cover for her,” Veltra mused. “Coming through a wyrmhole like that, assuming she truly did, could mess her aura about quite a lot.”
“I think this one would be hard to mess up more than she already is,” muttered Trill. From the other side of the room, Jesse rolled over in her sleep.

I promise I will discuss strategies for managing ‘Said’ in the next post, but for now you’re probably bored,  so I wont keep you.